Not Everyone is a Fertile Myrtle

About 10 percent of women -6.1 million, in the United States ages 15-44 have difficulty getting pregnant or staying pregnant, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention or the CDC.

Infertility is very common and is also very stressful and emotional. Everyone should be mindful that not everyone is able to just talk about kids and then get pregnant. For some women it takes years to even just conceive let alone actually give birth to a baby.

Most cases of female infertility are caused by problems with ovulation. Without ovulation, there are no eggs to be fertilized. Some signs that a woman is not ovulating normally include irregular or absent menstrual periods. Ovulation problems are often caused by polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS). PCOS is a hormone imbalance problem, which can interfere with normal ovulation. PCOS is the most common cause of female infertility. Primary ovarian insufficiency (POI) is another cause of ovulation problems. POI occurs when a woman’s ovaries stop working normally before she is 40. POI is not the same as early menopause.

Other less common causes of fertility problems in women include: Blocked fallopian tubes due to pelvic inflammatory disease, endometriosis, or surgery for an ectopic pregnancy. If a woman keeps having miscarriages, it is also called infertility. Lots of couples have infertility problems. About a third of the time, infertility can be traced to the woman. In another third of cases, it is because of the man. The rest of the time, it is because of both partners or no cause is found.

It is a good idea for any woman to talk to a doctor before trying to get pregnant. Doctors can help you get your body ready for a healthy baby. They can also answer questions on fertility and give tips on conceiving. Most experts suggest at least one year of actively trying to conceive before they go to infertility treatments and tests. Women 35 or older should see their doctors after six months of trying. A woman's chances of having a baby decrease rapidly every year after the age of 30.

Couples dealing with infertility may experience a wide spectrum of feelings such as jealousy, despair, envy, isolation, and bitterness. They may feel singled out, and they might find it difficult to fit into social circles where everyone else has children. Infertility can cause stress on a couple's personal, social, and sex lives. The anger and disappointment that often accompanies infertility can rub off on the marital companionship, and cause couples to blame one another. Many couples suffer with depression which in turn can lead them withdraw themselves.

Men and women tend to react somewhat differently to infertility. Women often experience profound grief and sadness. They tend to cry a lot and to reduce their anxiety by talking about what they're experiencing. Men express fewer anguished feelings and seem to be less affected by being childless. They generally don't feel as free to talk about their feelings and tend to have less opportunity to discuss them with friends.

Going somewhere where children are present can cause the pain of infertility to surface. As a result couples dealing with infertility tend to avoid these types of situations. When couples place procreation as the focus of their intimacy for a period of time, sexual intercourse becomes solely a way to create children; it no longer has the element of love, affection, or spontaneity.

The Family: A Proclamation to the World says, "We declare that God's commandment for his children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force." Being in an LDS community this can be very hard to deal with when everyone around you is having kids and telling you that you should be having kids when you are trying.

This is why couples struggling with infertility need support from family members and friends. It is important not to be intrusive into this very private dimension of a marriage but to be understanding and supportive. Here are a few tips to help the ones you love from the LDS church website.

Show understanding and acceptance.

· Listen without giving advice.

· Let the couple know you are there for them.

· Don't ask a woman if she is pregnant.

· Give the couple respect and privacy.

· Don't offer false hope.

· Don't joke about infertility.

· Don't suggest solutions, such as infertility treatments, adoption, or foster parenting. These are options that should be privately discussed between couples.

· Don't offer the commonly repeated misinformation that a woman who adopts often gets pregnant soon after.

Learn about infertility so you can be an informed listener.